You know, I really hate to say this (being one myself), but, sometimes guys are pathetic! They drop us like a hot stone, and we definitely want the girl back, but then we do it the completely wrong way!
She was special, sure, possibly even the love of your life, but if you really want the girl back, you have to do it the right way.
Now, I’m not a professional relationship counselor, but I don’t need to be. I’ve been exactly where you are now enough times to know how to fix things.
And the way to get the girl back is definitely not by making any of these three common mistakes:
1. Don’t buy her flowers. It’s pathetic and useless. Buying flowers for her is an act of sheer desperation, and even if you don’t recognize it as such, you can be sure she will. And why do you think spending a few measly dollars on a bunch of half-dead plants is going to melt his heart? Growing up!
2. Don’t try to apply “common sense” to the problem, for two reasons. First, when you are desperately trying to win the girl back, your common sense and logic have already gone out the window. Second, men and women just don’t think the same way – what’s common sense to you probably just seems like weird behavior to her! And her thinking that you’re getting weirder every day won’t help your cause.
3. Think about the first time you met her. Yes, it can be painful, but do it. Can you remember what she liked about you? Was it that you were strong, determined, and had a ‘presence’ that she found irresistible? Or was it that you were a sad, lonely, depressed figure with no purpose in life? The first, right? So what could make you believe that the way to get the girl back is to start acting sad and depressed? Forget it, she left you, remember? She expected you to be depressed, and now all you’re doing is confirming her worst fears!
Like I said before, I’m not a professional counselor, but I’ve been around women long enough and on enough occasions to know how they work.
And none of the above is going to do anything for your chances of getting it back!
Now let me tell you what will work…
First, you need to show her that you’re strong, that you’ve bounced back, and that you’re getting over her. At the same time, try to let her know that you are still interested in her, but only in its terms.
Don’t show weakness or neediness – those are exactly the things that will drive her away from you completely.
Second, stop thinking about yourself and try to think about what she wants right now. She tries to put you in her place.
You are probably suffering too much. She also needs a shoulder to cry on. All you have to do is make sure it’s yours!
And it’s really simple to do. Just think of the ‘good cop, bad cop’ routine from all those movies and TV shows.
One is tough and uncompromising, the other friendly and kind.
Apply the same logic to her. Sometimes be nice, friendly and gentle, and other times be aloof and uncompromising.
Show him that you can handle all the breaking up your way.
That you don’t need to play the game according to its rules.
Show that you are tough and strong enough to get ahead, no matter what.
Rediscover the strong and determined character within you that once loved so much.
Show him that character and you give yourself a very real chance that you can get the girl back.
