An introduction to Don Vinny:
mobster extraordinaire
Don Vinny sits before the open balcony of his elegant villa, petting his favorite cat – Figaro… a fine crystal glass of Montelpucino on the nearby mahogany table. He throws away the unlit cigarette that he had anchored between his lips (he never lights his cigarettes because he considers the aroma “raw and invasive”). He flips open his flip phone and barks orders at his henchmen, usually men with hard faces but who are ordered to wear tuxedos while “on the job.” They do, however, carry small plastic sheets in the unlikely event that blood splatters on the furniture during any planned work, whether the project involves taking down an adversary, robbing an art venue, or simply having your soldiers change “politely” someone’s disposition on a subject. . Don Vinny is eccentric, to put it mildly.
Don Vinny does not carry a weapon and refused to do so, instead carrying, among other things, a lint remover, once reprimanding a formidable foe for failing to properly maintain his suit during a gambling game gone awry. The anguished enemy flinched as Don Vinny reached slowly into his dark coat, pulled out the instrument and thoroughly brushed the guy’s coat while the henchmen held him down. The local police, who secretly tolerate and even applaud his style, keep up appearances to preserve civil order.
Kids love the Don as he often hands out chocolates on the streets, the local housewives frequently drop by and consult him on decorating tips and food recipes, while he and the local priest are chess partners /Playing. Don Vinny, although serious, is immensely kind. . Once, his female henchman severely mistreated a local adversary, only for the affable Don to immediately invite his nemesis to dinner at his mother’s house for veal sinners and gnocchi puttanesca.
Always surrounded by beautiful women, Don Vinny is now distracted in the middle of planning his next project. Always the quintessential mob metrosexual, the heist is being orchestrated, like all jobs, with sensitivity and an eye to minimizing violence…Don Vinny would rather rearrange someone’s furniture, then his face. He avoids violence of any kind and tries not to eliminate anyone unless it is totally unavoidable.
His most recent project involves robbing a Museum of Italian Art, the proceeds of which will go to his favorite charity, the local Sisters of Miraculous Mercies, a local group of sweet nuns who raised him as a child, and for whom there is a mutual admiration. . The sisters inadvertently become frequently involved in many of Don Vinny’s organized “projects”, but in conjunction with the eccentric Don, they carry out their joint ventures with minimal violence and always minimal flair.
This is an introduction to the wonderful character of Don Vinny… with many chapters to come.
